Safety Planning
Every stage of your involvement with an abuser will require different stategies to ensure your safety.
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If you leave your shared residence or area:
- Have an address that's different from where you're living. Think about renting a P.O. Box from your post office, or using a friend's address.
- Be aware that addresses are on restraining orders and police reports. Before filling out your new address on any forms, explore options to keep your address confidential.
- Be careful about giving out your new address and phone number.
- Change your work hours if you can.
- If you have children, let their school know what is going on.
- Consider changing your children's schools.
- Reschedule appointments you made before leaving that your abuser may know about.
- Consider telling your new neighbors about the situation. Make a plan with them for when you need help. Have a signal, like flashing the lights on and off or hanging something out the window, to tell them you need help.
- Talk to people you trust about the violence.
- If you can, replace any wood doors with steel or metal doors.
- Try to make sure that the outside of your house is well-lit. Think about getting a lighting system that lights up when a person is coming close to the house (motion sensitive lights). Keep bushes, trees, and other plants around your house well-trimmed. That way, you'll be able to see more of what is happening outside.
- Carry a cell phone if you can, but don't count on it too much. Cell phones may not get good service in some places, and batteries do run out. Ask your local domestic violence organization if they give out cell phones. Have emergency numbers on speed dial.
- Seek ongoing support from local domestic violence and mental health service providers.
from the National Center for Victims of Crime
